Today is GCSE results day. I took the worst Mum in the world route and went up to the school with H to collect them. A couple of hundred sixteen year old girls in the gym, most in jubilant clusters, some teary, all talking too loud. H wanted to leave as soon as she could, but she’s never liked a din. She can proudly sign up for her much anticipated college course this afternoon.
Inevitably it took me back to my own results, O’levels and a solitary insurance maths CSE back in 1984. I waited for them to arrive in the post, and cried when I got them. They weren’t bad, but I failed RE which seemed important at the time. Strange to say, I don’t think it’s held me back too much, I mean, there was a job I went for in a trendy 1991 baguette shop that I wasn’t offered so I can’t say for certain.....
On the plus side, I had my first orgasm that I hadn’t given myself that day. Nick and I drank cheap wine under a tree in Victoria Park. There were squirrels and sunshine to accompany the dry humping and sneaky shenanigans. Nick had no idea of what he had achieved, and I didn’t inform him for years afterwards. We were both innocents and far less well informed than we thought.
I went home to give the good news to my Mum, who took it well. The exam result, I mean.
Well done to everyone who got their GCSEs today. You took the courageous step to open the envelope.
Don't you just love this song?
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