Sunday 5.4.09

The energy rush brought on by the arrival of Spring was too good to be true. I'm back to listless dissociation. Today, I spent in bed, refusing to go to the Dr Who exhibition at Coventry Transport Museum with the rest of the family. I feel bad about it as it had been planned for some time. Like many families with teenagers, we don't do things enough things together so, even as a lay in bed in my empty house, strips of sunshine traversing the duvet, I felt guilty.

I feel I also let down my inner child, as between the ages of 5 and 12 I longed to see the Dr Who exhibition. Defying the gender stereotype, I was a regular viewer from the mid -Pertwee period, through vintage Baker, and to the end of Davidson. The Dr Who exhibition used to be at Longleat House with the lions. It was advertised on the TV, and was shown on Blue Peter. I don't know what far off places other kids dreamed of. I remember a very earnest school friend informing me that she and her family were, "just doing Butlins this year because we have to save up to go abroad every other year." This seemed unbelievably sophisticated to me. We never went on holiday, or even on day trips to semi-educational tourist attractions.

We lived in Cornwall, a county that isn't short of opportunities for slightly tacky family days out, but we never went. Flambards had the Poldark exhibition, featuring the history of Cornish the smuggling industry. I never saw it. Lands End had, well, rocks and a tea-shop (they've 'improved it since'). I have never seen it to this day. Dairyland had cows, Bird Paradise had birds, the Seal Sanctuary had seals, and I never went to any of them. I didn't mind any of that. My idea of a good day out was a trip to Redruth to go to John Oliver's which was a sort of independent WHSmith, where I might be allowed to choose a book or a random item of stationary (ah, but not the pop-a-point pencil which I really, really needed).

I longed and longed to be taken to Longleat House, but as much as I craved it and asked Jim'll Fix It for it, I knew it would never happen. Cornwall was a long way from Warminster. It has got closer as the roads have improved, but its still 174 miles each way, 3 hours 34 minutes according to the AA. People travelled less in the 70's anyway. There was less money around, cars were less comfortable, and expectations were lower. That was why my schoolfriend's holidays were such a big deal. Another friend once had a week in Ilfracombe, with no irony intended, wow it was amazing to think of.

The consequence of all of this is that I've never seen a real live Cyberman. I have seen a Dalek, because there is a tame one in Waterstones in the Coventry precinct branch. I've never seen it exterminate anyone though, it's worth regular visit, just in case it happens one day. Sadly for the younger me, I suppose I never will meet K9. I will do most things on my own, but when my mood picks up, I don't imagine that I'll want to walk around the exhibition on my own. It will be too scary for me.